My Soul’s Symphony

The most recent development in where I am at, really the first thing I've written since Wasted Time and the darker pieces not here. It came during the Real Life Fall Retreat 2010 during the morning session. It reveals God's hope and healing that is present in this desert, this wilderness.

Play my heart O Lord
Play my soul O Father
This out of tune instrument
which squeaks and squeals
has been locked in a case
in a case on display
as if a trophy instead of a beat
You won my heart O Lord
with love mercy and grace
my broken strings were made whole
the keys replaced
the reed restored
it bled notes of praise
powerful harmonies interlaced
for Your Glory and Your name
the notes filled the air
others heard and came
they saw your mighty hand
playing Love’s ballad true

and then it changed
This heart felt big
my soul grew in bloated fame
the notes, the melodies and harmonies
seemed ever more like mine
forgetting the grand hand that played
desiring nothing more than to sound good
so I put my pretty heart in this case
the glass surrounding made it shine
eyes stared, words pried
and no longer did I let him play
choosing hype over his Holy way
People stared but heard no sound
This well restored instrument
was more lost than found

I turned my heart O Lord
Time passed, change came
The people walked by forgetting
how this heart once made sound
a song long forgotten
an echo was all I heard
but now I long for what purpose
the reason why I was made
a symphony of the soul
that reveals a heart to be whole
letting the Spirit fill His role!
so I pushed the glass
pulled hacked and banged
making much noise
and someone came
a laughing face that pointed to a lock
black and rusted and never noticed before
my heart became silent
as my soul was sunk
hope seemed distance
I think I knew it once

So here I am
out of tune and trapped
stuck
My heart shrivels in this case
searching for that once seen hand
crying out in a disjointed tone
Play my heart O Lord
cause my soul to make melodies of holiness
My purpose is found only in You
without Your powerful hand, Your skill
my heart dies in a silence
only you can fulfill
the lock pops off, broken
the glass just gone
I’m pulled out and tweaked
As you bring me into the right key
My heart hurts but O Lord
the notes you play
for Your Glory and Your fame
soothing, the sound
this symphony